Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Open Letter to My Male Single Friends

Dear [name of male single friend] --

The fact that I'm now married doesn't mean I'm willing to jump on your grenades. Yes, the married guy makes the perfect wing man (nothing to gain = nothing to lose and fearlessness is generally considered to be the single most important attribute for a wing man) but that logic only works if you need help meeting the girl in the first place. If you have known her for a few years and know that she's got a terribly boring roommate, for heaven's sake don't be bringing the boring roommate out to dinner with us! For that matter, don't be bringing the girl you're interested in if you know I'm not bringing my wife! Look, I'm a dork. I realize this. I like spending my free time talking about business and politics and sports. If I've invited out to dinner, unless we were in the same fraternity in college, chances are I'm going to want to discuss these topics, not make small talk with girls I have nothing in common with. Do you know any girl who would be interested in talking about those things? You do? Fine. Marry her and start jumping on your own damn grenades!

Sounds Like somebody has a case of the Mondays.
This was funny. We call those nights "the infamous dinners."
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